
Slightly Wrong, Always Write.
An artistic place for the delightfully deranged.
Damn You, Chewing Gum
There’s definitely something fascinating about fire.
​
Different materials burn at different rates.
​
Some you have to be very patient with--like the edge of a toilet seat or the silver backing of a mirror.
While others ignite surprisingly fast, such as chewing gum, which bubbles and drips flaming goo if you’re not prepared.
​
Which wouldn’t be a big deal if it wasn’t the same day I chose to reorganize my matchbook collection and refill my kerosine lamps.
​
Luckily the kegs of gunpowder weren’t due to arrive until the following day, or so I thought.
​
Turns out I'd spent the entire day thinking it was Tuesday, when it was really Wednesday the whole time.
​
Which also meant that I just missed fish tank cleaning day.
Leaving me with a dilemma.
​
Break all the tanks and douse the fire, or leave them alone and blow us all up?
​
Because if I break the tanks to save myself, then all my fish will die, leaving me to live with the guilt of knowing I’m only alive because I killed my pets.
​
But if I don’t break the tanks then the fire will destroy us all, because I just had to know if chewing gum would burn.
​
Well, guess what? It does.
​
So, damn you, chewing gum. Damn you.